Tips for Preparing Big Brother or Big Sister for a Newborn Photography Session
This is one of the questions I hear most from expecting parents, right up there with “will my baby sleep?” and “what should we wear?” And it makes sense — you’ve got a brand new baby, a toddler or school-aged kid with opinions, and you’re trying to imagine how any of this is going to work.
Here’s the honest answer: it works out just fine. Almost always. And the images you get of your older child meeting and loving on the new baby are often the ones you’ll treasure most.
Since my newborn sessions are in-home, having a sibling around is actually pretty natural. This is their house too. There’s no unfamiliar studio, no weird backdrop, no pressure to perform. We work with whatever the day brings.
Here’s how I handle it.
I pay attention to the older sibling first.
When I arrive, I make a point of connecting with big brother or sister before I even look at the baby. I want them to feel seen and important — because they are. I might ask them to be my helper, show me their favorite toy, or just chat for a few minutes. Kids who feel included are kids who cooperate.
We do sibling and family photos early.
Little ones are most engaged and cooperative right at the start of a session, before they get bored or tired. So we’ll do family groupings and sibling-with-baby photos soon after I arrive, while everyone still has energy. If a toddler won’t sit still — which is completely normal and expected — we’ll move to a bed or couch where things feel more like play than posing. Sometimes the backyard works well too.
Siblings are in and out — and that’s the plan.
A newborn session typically runs about 90 minutes. Big kids don’t need to be present the whole time. When I’m focused on the baby alone, siblings can go play, watch something, eat a snack. When they wander back in curious about what we’re doing, I love to include them — a kiss on baby’s head, a hand on a tiny foot, just being in the background. Some of the best sibling photos happen completely unplanned.
One parent may need to keep an eye on older kids during the solo newborn portion, just as they normally would. This is not a problem — it’s just how it goes.
Food, sleep, and favorite toys matter more than you think.
A well-rested, well-fed older sibling is a cooperative older sibling. I always recommend that kids eat a good meal before I arrive and, if possible, have had a normal night of sleep. Favorite toys are absolutely welcome — comfort objects make kids feel at home, which makes everything easier.
Timing can work around naps.
I typically shoot weekday mornings starting around 9am, but I’m flexible. If your older child naps mid-morning, we can adjust. One option that works well: I arrive toward the end of naptime, photograph the baby while the sibling sleeps, and then include everyone once they wake up happy and refreshed. We’ll figure out what makes the most sense for your family.
And a note for your own sanity: the schedule will not go as planned. Big sister won’t nap. Big brother will have been up at 5am. Baby will decide today is not a sleepy day. This is all completely fine and normal. Do not stress about it. I’ve been doing this for nearly two decades and I have yet to encounter a situation we couldn’t work with.
Safety is always first.
When we photograph siblings close to the baby, safety is my top priority. I never place a newborn in a position that requires someone else to hold them safely without my guidance. If an older sibling isn’t quite ready to snuggle gently, we find another way — mom or dad holds baby while big brother leans in, or we capture them nearby rather than right on top of each other. There are always options.
A few things you don’t need to worry about:
You do not need to hire a grandparent or extra helper just to manage your older child. You do not need your kids to be perfectly behaved. You do not need a spotless house. Just show up, feed everyone, and let me handle the rest.
Frequently Asked Questions About Siblings at Newborn Sessions
What should the older sibling wear? Simple, comfortable clothing in neutral or muted tones works best — nothing too busy or logo-heavy. I’d coordinate them loosely with what the rest of the family is wearing without being too matchy. Most importantly, dress them in something they’re comfortable moving around in. We’re not asking anyone to sit still for long.
Does the sibling need to be there the whole time? Not at all. We’ll do sibling and family photos early in the session, and after that older kids are free to play, snack, watch something, or just do their thing. They’re welcome back anytime they’re curious, but there’s no expectation that they’re present for the whole 90 minutes.
Can we get a photo of the sibling holding or kissing the baby? We can absolutely try! These are some of my favorite images to capture. That said, I never force it — if a toddler isn’t feeling it that day, we find another way to include them that feels natural. A gentle hand on baby’s head, leaning in close while mom holds the baby, or just being nearby can be just as sweet. Some of the best sibling moments happen completely on their own terms.
What age can a sibling be in newborn photos? Any age — toddlers, school-aged kids, even teenagers. The approach just changes a little depending on age. Toddlers need more movement and play built in. Older kids are usually easier to direct and often genuinely sweet with a new baby.
What if the older sibling is having a bad day or won’t cooperate? It happens, and it’s okay. I’ve never had a session derailed by a difficult toddler — we just adapt. Sometimes the most honest, real images come from the chaotic moments. A grumpy big brother still makes for a great photo twenty years from now.
Should I tell my older child what to expect beforehand? Yes — a little preparation goes a long way. Let them know a photographer is coming to take pictures of the whole family, including them. Books about being a big sibling can help younger kids feel proud rather than left out. Avoid putting pressure on them to behave perfectly.
How long will sibling photos take? Usually 15–20 minutes at the start of the session. After that they’re off the hook.
Additional newborn photography session information
If you’re planning a newborn session in the Longmont, Berthoud, Boulder, or surrounding Front Range area, I’d love to hear from you. Learn more about what my newborn sessions include or reach out here to check availability.
Six Tips for a Newborn Photography Session
How to Prepare Your Home for an In Home (or Newborn) Photography Session
